Somali adulterer stoned to death

SOMALIA, AFRICA (TS) -- Islamists in southern Somalia have stoned a man to death for adultery but spared his pregnant girlfriend until she gives birth.

This story was brought to my attention by my bro Matt.
I saw this headline and thought I'd find material to write an article about the dangers of marijuana.

Also, I figured I could relate, because I've definitely committed more than my fair share of adultery while stoned.

Then I remembered there are no dangers of smoking marijuana... except it's a total gateway... to Twinkies and 3am pizza.

I decided to check it out anyway... and found a tale so corrupt I had to write about it.

I've always thought of Somalia as a lawless, diseased, civil war torn country, filled with murderers and blood thirsty thieving high seas terrorists... but to know it's also a Devil's playground of rampant infidelity... Well that's pretty disheartening.

Abas Hussein Abdirahman, 33, was killed in front of a crowd of some 300 people in the port town of Merka.

Al-Shabab official Sheikh Suldan Aala Mohamed said Mr Abdirahman had confessed to adultery before an Islamic court.

This story is going to make my fucking spell checker explode.

"He was screaming and blood was pouring from his head during the stoning. After seven minutes he stopped moving," an eyewitness said.

"Just like my first wife" Woody Allen said.

The funny thing is, when the stoning victim met his ripe young Somali tart, he was too shy to even talk to her. I guess he must've got a little boulder.

It's pretty nice of the extremists to allow the baby to be born before they keep on rockin' in the third world, I wonder if they'll give it to the dude's wife, as legally, that sperm belonged to her.

It's a messed up world friends... what ever happened to that sweeter, simpler time when if you wanted to punish a dude for sexual deviance, you'd just cut off his hoo-ha and fry it up?

Love (the one you married or you'll be stuck between a rock and... several other rocks),
Chris Real