MIAMI, FL (TS) - A man in Southwest Miami-Dade was found dead early Tuesday near a colony of tens of thousands of bees, though it's unclear if his death was caused by stings from the bees.Well Honey, there's some good buzz around this story.
He should've minded his own beeswax.
Ok, so here's the thing... I don't know that it's any great secret that Florida is BY FAR the stupidest state in the USA. In a country that also includes Texas, Tennessee, and Alabama, that is REALLY saying something.
Floriduh.
So let's search for examples of stupid in this story.
#1, obviously, is the dead dude himself. From the linked article:
The victim wore protective gear that covered his head and upper body, but not the rest of his body.
This would indicate that either this guy is too dumb to know there might be some things BELOW the belt line that might need protecting, or else the spam e-mails from "Penis Power" and "Extenderz" and "Sir Throbbalot" finally convinced him he needed to try something, anything, to somehow get that area swelled up a bit.
#2, also from the linked article:
The victim was found on top of the roof of a three-story apartment complex. The hive, which measured about three feet, was near the roof.
Police said they could not say whether the man died from a heart attack, a fall or from bee stings.
Ok... buddy was found on the TOP OF THE ROOF, and police haven't ruled out a fall? Did he fall UP three stories?
With this guy's bumbling death, the average IQ for the USA went up slightly, but in Floriduh, it stayed exactly the same.
Police have not released the man's name, but whoever you are, see ya, wouldn't wanna... nah that's too easy.
Bzzzzzzzz,
Chris Real
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